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Writer's pictureJulio Ramirez

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008) Review



THE FOLLOWING REVIEW CONTAINS SPOILERS OF THE DISCUSSED FILM. READERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED.


When you love a filmmaker so much, it makes it hard to admit they would make a movie far from their greater predecessors. This is surprisingly the case with Director Steven Spielberg because after years of contributing a fantastic array of films, his first fumble occurred with Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, a fumble I have no shame in watching as much as I want.

PLOT

The film takes place in 1957 and follows the titular archaeologist go through an adventure unlike any other. He and current partner George 'Mac' McHale are abducted by Soviet agent Irina Spalko to uncover the remains of an extraterrestrial that crash landed a decade prior. Jones finds it in Hangar 51 but as he escapes, Mac reveals his newfound allegiance with the Soviets, for the sake of money. He is able to avoid the enemy by entering a model town designed for a planned nuclear detonation. He is able to survive the blast by hiding in a lead-lined refrigerator. Due to his connection with Mac, the FBI would have him under investigation, resulting in him going through an indefinite leave of absence as professor of Marshall College. Upon boarding a train, he encounters a young adult named Mutt Williams who warns him his friend Harold Oxley and his mother Mary are in danger. Mutt explains to Indy that Oxley was studying of a crystal skull, went missing after finding it in Akator aka El Dorado and was last seen in Peru. Apparently, the skull is the origin of the city's civilization but was taken at some point between 15th/16th century and the one who returns it will be given control of its power. When Mutt shares with Indy his last letter written by his mother 'Mary', it confirms she and Ox have been kidnapped by the Soviets. Said agents try to take the letter from him and Jones as it would contain a foreign language, hoping to apprehend the former again and have him decode it. Both men head to Peru to pick up on the trail Ox left behind. They first find a psychiatric hospital he was locked in until the Soviets picked him up. His former cell would contain clues of the conquistador who went seeking in the 1500s to seek Akator. They find the skull hidden in the said conquistador's grave, only to be abducted by Mac and the Soviets. At the enemy's camp, Indy and Mutt not only reunite with Ox but also Mutt's mother who happens to be the former's ex Marion Ravenwood. Irina tends to find Akator in hopes to gain psychic power from the skull, wheras Ox suffered a mental breakdown due to being overexposed by the skull's power. In a failed attempt to escape at night, Marion admits to Indy that Mutt is his son, Henry III. They succeed in their second attempt at day, and Mac would join them when claiming to be acting as a double agent. This would only be a ruse for him to leave a trail of homing devices for Irina to follow. He and the group of protagonists would find El Dorado, avoiding conflict with the native tribe due to Ox wielding the skull. As they reach the largest temple, they find a chamber of 13 crystal skeleton of aliens with the same shaped skull, proving they built the city. When Irina catches up, she takes the crystal and places it into the sole headless skeleton. When that happens, the alien awakens and all 13 skeletons merge into one singular figure. As Irina demands to know everything, the alien does just that only for the overwhelming amount to break her mind and kill her in the process. The alien would leave with its ship through a portal and Mac is killed as he gets sucked into the portal. Ox regains his mental conscience when he and the Jones family escape from the temple. As they all return to the United States, the film would end with Indy be reinstated at Marshal College, be promoted to Associate Dean and finally marry Marion.

THOUGHTS

I recall binging on the Indiana Jones trilogy in 2007, which led me very excited to this follow up by the next year. And while I don't declare this film to be amazing like its predecessors, I don't think it had to be to be generally entertaining. There are a lot of things that do and do not work, so bare with me as I go back and forth with my pros and cons. I am aware that uncovering aliens is completely different from the religious aspects previously explored, but I think of this shake up was to prove anything is possible. This said factor does and doesn't work in its own way; For example the visual design of the alien was solid, but I can't say the same with the prairie dogs. I am deeply disturbed of the fire ants though. All the practical set pieces were very intriguing to behold and each chase sequence was just thrilling enough to enjoy. Going from the escape from Hangar 51 to the extravagant rainforest chase, I was biting my fingernails out of simultaneous nervousness and excitement. And I still couldn't get enough of John Williams' score that continues to make me feel part of the adventure. While I respect those things that kept me invested, I got to admit there were many moments that upset me dearly for not really making any sense. Going from the top, I don't think we needed to know Hangar 51 was where the Ark of the Covenant was the whole time. I know franchises enjoy showing easter eggs/callbacks, which is what happened in the Last Crusade where Indy passed by a mural of it, but there was no need to see the real deal. It took away the mystery of where it'd be hidden and sometimes, the mystery makes the story better. I found that more ridiculous than Indy surviving a nuclear blast by hiding in a fridge. And was the plywood really dense enough to keep the crate from magnetizing the ceiling lights? I know aliens have complicated technology, but I have a hard time plywood would do the trick even if the crate was under other crates. It even ruins consistency when it doesn't continue acting magnetizing as it is moved out of the building. They further ruin consistency when showing Indy have a random pic of the late Marcus Brody in what looked like of a headshot for The Last Crusade. I refused to believe any random character would give a pic like this to Indy. Speaking of which, they even did him dirty when his statue got destroyed. It's like no one liked this character which I refuse to believe. I like Ray Winstone, but I don't think Mac had emotional weight in comparison to past characters. It's like they wrote him to be an evil doppelganger of Sallah, whose greed eliminates any proof of past loyalty, so I don't feel bad for him when he meets his dark fate. I did think it was cool for Mutt to make his entrance via motorcycle, but I doubt he would be allowed to do so at a train station. That is more confusing than finding out Indy would be at the train station since he didn't even know yet of his profession. I know Ox was losing his mind when finding the skull, but he left a lot to chance for people like Indy to find him because writing a riddle in a dead language is a big leap to take. And where were the generators used for the electricity the Soviets were using for their tents? I mean that is a lot to carry on them for the sake of torture. Continuity errors would even strike again because Irina would turn the nob to its highest level in one shot, but it was already set there in the previous shot. The Soviets even mess up big time by not taking Indy's whip, the one weapon he used to escape from Hangar 51. I don't want to root for the bad guys, but it's like they enjoy the chase. I even found it ridiculous for how easy it was for the Jones family to escape on their second try when none of the Soviets behind them even tried to shoot them down. That's dumber than them not confiscating Mutt's pocket knife. And where exactly was Indy shooting the missile at during the rainforest chase? Everybody was at so many directions, I almost lost track of what was happening. And Mutt could've used the gun attached to the car to shoot Irina when she briefly had her hands on the skull. And lastly, how the hell was it even possible for the alien to be decapitated in the first place? Considering how powerful they appear to be by the end, there should've been an answer on how that happened. The only way I have been able to brush off these issues goes to its unique message reminding us knowledge is the true treasure in life, just like Raiders. The Last Crusade did say it was about family that was more important the materials we attach ourselves to, knowledge can remain just as valuable as those we love dearly because that is what makes us smarter everyday: With knowledge, we learn from our mistakes and discover new things everyday. Without knowledge, we will never adapt to our surroundings. It's obvious I would've not caught on to this thanks to the rest of the talented ensemble. Decades later, Harrison Ford still steals our hearts as the cynic historian who remains a brave veteran through and through, no matter what. Deep down he is someone who knows how valuable it is the knowledge that comes the artifacts he finds. And the older he gets, the more passionate he gets as well. Now that he has a family, he has to try to make every moment matter or it'll all for nothing in his eyes. By the end of it, I think he did because he finally reached a point where he can't be afraid of the next chapters his life can take with the people he loves. It was long overdue for Karen Allen to return as Marion because no love interest can ever the top the one tough woman he ever met. It's hard to not smile when they reunite when she does because you just know they're meant to be. I don't think anyone would've expected Indy to have a child since he was always out and about being the thrill seeker we know him for, which made it a bigger surprise to meet his son Mutt. Shia LaBeouf arguably leaves a positive mark for channeling the energy to be a rebellious yet intelligent man, much like his dad. He chose to stay out of school because he didn't want to feel grounded in life and wanted to find his own way to explore. Once he finds out who his dad is, he saw the value of education and respected the path he took. With his parents finally marrying, it's safe to say they had more adventures to share before the Dial of Destiny changed everything. You definitely felt bad for Ox since his passion got the best of him, hence briefly losing sanity. Nevertheless, the late John Hurt was able to remind us what an intelligent & optimistic figure Indy imagined him to be. Even though Jones lost close friends like his Henry Senior and Marcus, it's good to know he still had friends apart from Ox. In his given time, Jim Broadbent was able to make him memorable for embracing himself to be another honorable and faithful companion in his life. Last but not least, each entry of this franchise had had quite the array of villains, but I don't think they made such a mark as Irina did. Cate Blanchett made her a standout for being the most tenacious. Like Indy, she knew how powerful knowledge can be, but her demise would predictably become her own doing because she assumed she could be capable of manipulating it. Just when I thought I was recovering from the fire ants feasting, I was stunned seeing her evaporate from her head. To wrap up, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is a hands down guilty pleasure adventure film that is far from terrible. If you are still a fan at this point, I wish you good luck to find patience with this.

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